Thanksgiving Game Predictions

Yes, I know it's been a while. Blame school and work. This week I am finally back, and no, I am not talking about the Commanders' season. It will instead be on the three Thanksgiving games, which are actually good this year. So without wasting any more time…

Packers at Lions AKA The Ford Field Food Fight

Thanksgiving in Detroit is a family tradition at this point, and the Packers are that annoying cousin who keeps showing up uninvited and eating all the good food. The Lions finally think they're the adults at the table now, but the Packers love nothing more than ruining a perfectly nice holiday. One team is leaving the table full; the other is leaving with nothing but cold mashed potatoes and regret. I am picking the Packers because the Lions struggled with the Giants last week. Those things have no correlation, but I needed a reason to pick the Packers.

Packers 28, Lions 20

Chiefs at Cowboys AKA The Battle of Texas

Here’s your fun fact of the day: the Chiefs used to play in Texas.  Just because it's a day off doesn't mean you can't learn something new.  Before Kansas City, they were the Dallas Texans, which means this matchup is basically a messy family reunion with one sibling who moved away and got way more successful. The Cowboys will try to defend their turf, the Chiefs will try to remind everyone they used to own it, and by the end of the day, at least one reader will walk away having learned more NFL history. As for a pick, I AM NEVER PICKING THE COWBOYS!

Chiefs 22, Cowboys 17

Bengals at Ravens AKA The Pre Black Friday Bowl

When these two teams play, you can always expect fireworks. On Black Friday, expect fights over discounted TVs, trampled shopping carts, and somebody’s grandma sprinting faster than the Bengals’ secondary. This game is basically the warm-up act: chaos, desperation, and absolutely no regard for human life between the tackles. The Ravens will try to bully their way down the field, the Bengals will try to keep up, and by the fourth quarter, it’ll look a lot like the entrance line at a Target at 4:59 a.m. The keyword there is try for the Bengals because, although it's Joe Burrow's first game back, they don’t have a defense to help him.

Ravens 31,  Bengals 24